WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
