fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
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That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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