just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
