at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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