Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
