Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
