There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
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He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
don't judge my taste in strippers
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I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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