Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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