He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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