Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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