having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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