the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I need a burrito and a hug.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Randomize
