I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
