Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize