YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
