i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
