i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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