I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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