no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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