on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
