So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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