That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
