I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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