Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
