I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize