You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
