Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
