i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
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this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
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i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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