I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
