I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
