do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
whose parrot is this?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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