Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
