I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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