:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
