help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
