he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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