I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Best friends brother. Beat that.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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