Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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