when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
