new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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