Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Randomize
