Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
