Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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