i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize