that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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