The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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