i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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