If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
