he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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