It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
