Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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