I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.